Singapore Blogger That You Should Avoid

How do you say one is fuck up?

Like doing things others ain't?

Or like...

Get email don't reply.

Reply already don't attend

Attend already don't take picture

Take picture also pose like shit

Pose properly already don't edit

Edit already don't blog

Blog also blog like irrelevant much stuff

Irrelevant never mind and still always put sexy pictures of other girls

As if sexy pictures not enough still always talk about Sex

Talks about sex still not the worst, worst is not even funny.

This guy lor

Chao Ah Beng still wanna act one cool. Don't smoke but take picture at smoking point. Poser.

Okay lah... Actually I love myself and I think I am awesome. Just bored and wanted to disturb SEO and Google search words again. LOL.

But I believe there are things we are all guilty of doing once in awhile especially when you start to blog for money and some bloggers are just that unethical.. blah blah blah.. Not fully their fault because nobody ever taught anyone how to be a blogger anyway.  Oh wait, I actually did. And Twice! Actually maybe more..  okay. i just did a search and realized how nagging I am. 

Be happy with what you are doing and if you want to earn money or get something out of it, make sure you are not the only one who is happy because you just traded your happiness to your client for some cash.

Okay bye!

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Crafting Your Twitter Bio.

*Disclaimer: This post is in no way trying to insult anyone. Simply for laugh. If anyone is offended, please let me know and I will add you to the "I am offended by Smith" list and wait for review. In any case, Sorry in advance.

I am not too sure how much attention do you guys pay to the little introduction of yourself on Twitter or better known as the Twitter Bio.

I actually do pay a lot of attention to it. Not just everyone's else but also my own. I always seems to have problem filling it up not because I am too awesome and have too much to tell but it always seems so difficult to find the right tone.

I wish to tell you what kinda person I am, I want to be quirky and put up something funny which is totally irrelevant but at the same time I feel like there is a need to brag a little about myself in order to impress someone within the shortest time.

So I thought what the heck, why not let me try putting myself into some templates of famous Twitter accounts in the local scene to see how I sound like?

                                                       ----------------------------------------

Of course! I'll start with the Blog Father. @MrBrown 

Smithankyou aka Jiahua Leong, Sexblogger of Singapore. Bathroom Poet, MRT Traveler and YouTuber. Loves Selfies and Basketball. Uncle of Joy, Faith & Luke. (Really, my nieces middle names are really Faith and Joy too.)

Local Blog Queen - @Xiaxue 

Bastarding now comes in 7 inches

Top Food Directory - @LadyIronChef 

My job is to make you horny.

Who else other than our local face of Twitter - @Ladyxtel

Product Director @MeGuideU for Singapore. Wrote @OmySG. Loves being l ame and enjoys fermented wheat. Always talking.

 An interesting local name in the local scene - @estellekiora 

Love-maker, #Girl Finder, #Sexy Creature, Aspiring #Entrepreneur & #SG Top #Lifestyle #Blogger 2014 aka Humsupman. I want to make the world a hornier place!

Must be one of my favourite follower, Miss Singapore - @Valerie__Lim 

Bipolar. Fatness fan. Best Lifestyle blog 2014. BMT Platoon 2nd 2004. singapore blogger smithankyou.com Instagram @Smithankyou 

Local real director - @jackneojackneo

Blogger of Thai Pub Culture, Why is Pandora So Popular, Story of Alvin & Yuki... Blogged 1187 posts. Uweekly Singapore Called me The Unicorn

 What if I were a brand? - @StarhubCares 

I'm here to pissed you off: 9am - 11pm from Mon - Fri | 8am - 12pm Sat & Sun excluding PH. Visit Smithankyou.com & read my nonsense.

 What about copying something from my friend? - @Hpility 

@Smithankyou's Official Twitter | Smithankyou.com | IG: @Smithankyou

 What about being like one of Singapore's hottest man? - @TommyWee 

Product Director. Independent influencer. I support hot girls and underdogs. Fat but improving. Say hi at Smithleong@gmail.com, Linkedin/Instagram@Smithankyou

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I guess at the end of the day there is no better way to brag talk about yourself in your own way. Nothing of these really makes me feel like myself or even close. Some are just too much for my style while some are just too direct and "meh" to me. Which one do you prefer or do you have something you can come out with which is better for me?

What is your style? Humble? Show off? Direct? Your favourite quote?

Here's me for now.

If you are not following me on Twitter yet, see you there!

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The Ultimate Wedding "Proposal".

God knows since when wedding proposal in Singapore has gotten more and more ridiculous. From flash mod to touching videos to what not. If you remember, I did my little proposal many years ago too. If you have forgotten, here it is to refresh your memory.



Anyway, years has passed and we are officially "married" in terms of law, we did a simple ROM to sign the paper so we can move into our HDB.

I mean although we have been staying together for more than a year and things are really happy (besides the part I need to do the house work) but in the eyes of the traditional family, we are not exactly official until we do the customary tea ceremony.

There are 8967851235123 reasons why I do not like wedding dinners but woman being woman Mrs.Smith still wants a wedding dinner (or some sort) so I am proposing something alternate for a change. 1 of the 8967851235123 reasons why I do not like wedding dinner is simply because I feel like me sitting at my table and eating and so are my guests makes the wedding so disconnected and it really ain't something I like. My friends probably spend only 3mins with me, 1 before and 2 during the table photo shoot. hur hur hur~

SO, I did this ultimate "proposal" to my wife on a powerpoint.

Up for auction. You may want to pre-order. 

So will my "client" say yes? Stay tuned!

P.S: this is how I will might dress if this proposal go through:

台客@KTV is very thematic right? 

Mr.Smith, YO AH YO 8 8 1 ah YO AH YO~

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Worst Super Hero EVER!

And you thought super heroes like Batman and Ironman is really cool but not so "super" because they are just rich and that makes them lame; you have to know there are worst.

When I say worst I mean really really bad, he is so bad that when I was doing my research on "worst super hero" he was totally forgotten.

And you thought having any super power should easily make you really cool, think again.

Introducing Eye-Scream. He is a real super hero from Marvel and not made up by me.

Sorry I can't find a better picture of him.

His writeup from Marvel.com:

"Eye-Scream was born a mutant and at an early age discovered he had the "amazing" ability to turn into any flavor ice cream he wished. One day Eye-Scream decided to destroy the X-Men since their powers made his look stupid. He then devised a strategy in which to best destroy the X-Men. Months later he arrived at the Xavier Institute and snuck into the Mansion. A clown by the name of Obnoxio, however, was at the mansion at the time and helped the X-Men stop Eye-Scream by freezing him. After this event Eye-Scream dropped out of sight and has not been heard from since. It is unknown whether he was de-powered after the House of M ordeal or if he retained his powers."

Yes, his power is changing the freaking Ice-scream flavor. Like what? I guess the reason he dropped out is because he is currently working with Ben & Jerrys or something. 

Mr.Smith, my superpower is that I turn invisible when no one is looking.  

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PM make changes to cabinet.

So he wanted a new look and here it is.

Sorry for the lame joke. Here it is. 

And...

 

Mr Smith Leong will be appointed Minister of State in Ministry of Fun and the Ministry of Awesomeness Development.








Thank you for reading.

Mr.Smith, buy new cabinet also go onto newspaper. wah lau.

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Gordon Ramsay In Singapore meeting Singaporean Girls.

Hi! HAAAAAAVE YOU MET GORDON?

Image from http://allthepiecesmatter.wordpress.com/

So we heard that Gordon Ramsay is coming to Singapore. As my bro Barney Stinson once told me, as a host, we have to be the wingman. And here is a video of our conversation about getting him to meet some of my female friends. 



The challenge is on! 

This is going onto the playbook for sure.

Please take it with a pitch of salt as we all know his real reason here is because he was challenged by a group of food blogger to this hawker food face off and not challenged by our local sex blogger on picking up girls.

So don't forget to vote for your favorite hawker heroes (The REAL reason why he is here for BTW.)! http://www.hawkerheroes.com/

I WANNA SEE RAMSAY FLIP PRATA LAH!!!

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I finally got a N95.

So i finally got a mask and everyone go on and on about me not having a N95 and it's as good as not having so. I mean, how can it be as bad as nothing? Anyway so I got pissed off and went to the nearest Ah Beng shop and got a N95.

Smith: "Do you have a N95?"

Ah Beng: "Sure, but very old leh. You sure?"

S: "It's okay. My friend say only N95 can save my life."

AB: "Okay lor.. What size you want?"

S: "Erm.. size? I think the most common one lor. Like can cover my face.."

AB: "Wah.. how to find so big one. At most I have is 8GB... What color you want?"

S: "huh? 8GB? is that a model? I thought I want N95? Color? You have a choice? Black maybe? Not so easy get dirty right?"

AB: "Correct lah.. N95.. You heng ah.. I still hap one black one.. nah.."

So, here is the story of me getting a N95.

Mr.Smith, TAKE THAT! THIS IS N95!

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Interviewed by Times Magazine for being the Singapore most popular WTH Blogger.

 I was very fortunate to be interviewed by Times magazine over Email last week. It will be published on Times magazine issue 87658751293781023.

And below is the fake interview that I sent myself and I thought I should share my answers here since it will never be published
.
Why did you started blogging? 

I started blogging to note down events that happened in my life so I could easily refer to in future as well as to write. I enjoy writing but I am not the best writer around so I wished to improve it by purely practicing. I also enjoy the attention I get for sharing interesting/random concept and ideas I have. I am not afraid to tell people that I am crazy and I live my 1 life the only way it should be lived.

Awesome written all over my face.

How did you started blogging?

I registered a blog URL like everyone else and started writing rubbish of my daily happenings until one day I got an invite to an event as a blogger few years ago by Ben and Jerry's and from that event, I met a lot of new friends and I suppose I got some attention with my writing and my loud voice. I soon got more attention on my blog as well as my Twitter account. My blog had an average readership of 5 per day for the first 4 years of it's existent.

And you talk about sex...

This is SEX.

Yes, many have asked me this question like why and how over the years and over 686982131 cups of beer and coffee. Frankly, the sex blog is not inspired by Edison and neither is it by Gary Ng, it was inspired by HPB.( I bet the story got half as exciting now.) They had this ZOO Card and site back then which is LetsTalkAboutSex and I thought I can do it too! So I started that and I just update it once in awhile but god knows what happened people prefer to know me and introduce me with that title of "Sex Blogger".

What The Hell?

Yes, that is what I was nominated for at OMY Blog Awards for both 2012 and 2013. I don't like to blog about things as it is or just keep talking about events and stuff. I don't see a point of blogging if I do not have an opinion of my own. Just copy and pasting press release makes my blog an event listing site and not a personal blog.

So you are a lifestyle blogger? 

Frankly, I hate it when I am introduced as a lifestyle blogger because lifestyle means nothing. It simply means that my blog is not focused and talks about everything. Which is true but I hate it. I hate it because as a marketing person I know the importance of positioning myself like the tech bloggers, beauty bloggers but I just do not wish to write a topic for each blog and have 7 URLS talking about sex, NBA, ink, Social Media, News and what not. So normally when asked I would just say that I blog about me. Things that are me.

Where do you get your inspiration? 

My very 1st blog inspiration was actually KennySia. I spent a lot of time reading his blog and how he blogs. He is funny and quirky so I believe my blog very 1st inspiration was him. Being crazy and wacky.

From Kennysia.com

As for now, I get a lot of my crazy inspiration from talking to people. They always say that you learn the most when you teach and that is true. Every time I talk to a new blogger or some client, it gives me inspiration for my Social Media posts. Other than that if it's news, girls, sex, scandal, NBA, they are mostly interesting topics off my Twitter Feed.

One thing you really hate blogging about..

Food, I hate talking about food and everybody knows this fact. I have no idea how to talk about a plate of good food in 308698123 ways other than just saying it is good, but interesting enough it was one of the 1st thing I blogged about back then and I was even a blogger of a group blog - SGFoodieClub.

And your favorite blog post is..

Alvin from Alvinology.com

There are a lot of posts that I've written over the years that I will still laugh at while reading it. So I guess it's really hard to say which is my favorite. If I have to pick one it will be the event blogging 101 where I "suan" people. I enjoy doing that. 

Suan people? Are you not afraid that you will offend the wrong person and get your blog into trouble? 

Frankly blogging is just a hobby to me. I don't see how I can offend the wrong person and get myself into trouble like getting "boycott". I've seen monkeys doing worst but still in the industry. Moreover I've already scolded the media guy from OMY openly online and that didn't even got me onto the newspaper. What else does 1 need to do to get famous here?



Get famous? But you are already famous right?

From http://reginachow.blogspot.sg/

NO. I guess you can say I am awesome, you can also say I am actively blogger or even popular within my clique but I am not famous. Famous is when mass audience knows about you. People like Xiaxue, Mr.Brown, QiuQiu or even Alvinology but mass audience don't read my blog. My blog is like how my friend put it, the HDB Blog. Like how your mum is popular at the market near your place where she is the most popular auntie around but frankly not famous yet cause nobody knows her at another market. Get the drift? 

If you ain't gonna blog, what else will you be doing?

Seriously? Blogging is a hobby. Without blogging I can do a lot more. Like try to take over the world or something. Please. 

Can you give some tips to bloggers who wished to be like you?

You can try, you can make an effort, read more, write more, be friendly, be funny BUT... You will never be me. So don't waste your time.

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Here you go. And btw, if you believe this blogspot, you probably believe Santa Claus is real.

Mr.Smith, fake interview is fun! You should try it too!

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My wife left me (again).

Here you go. For immediate release...

It's not the first time I'm doing such silly things. 

Oh well, I hope she have a good time and good rest while away! 

Mr.Smith, stay at home to look after the animals.  

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How to choose a correct bra.

There is something my colleague, Eunice Tan has to do every Friday. No, not coming into office late but read her weekly dose of fashion update - Urban.

They have this article on choosing the right bra so I was very inspired to write a post about it.

We have read much about it, like choosing the right size, the right type for the right dress and blah blah blah. Those articles are always written or researched by women which in my professional opinion is not true.

Women might say they are dressed to feel good, to make themselves feel comfortable and blah blah but I say you ladies are dressed to kill. Who? The men of course. What makes you feel good? When men turn their head when you walk pass, when men stares at you and fall into the pool or maybe when men say you look pretty today. You can deny all you want but I am saying it, women are dressed for men in one way or the other. touch Search yourself and ask yourself again. ;P

So ladies, let Mr.Smith tells you what bra to wear...

For, t-shirt, singlet, dress, bare back, shirt, blah blah blah, if you titties are nice...

Random picture from Tumblr.

 you DO NOT need bras.

For, t-shirt, singlet, dress, bare back, shirt, blah blah blah, if you titties are NOT nice...

You don't need to wear bra too cause no one is looking!

Bottomline:You DO NOT need to wear bra! XD

I hope you ladies know that I'm just trolling. Frankly, bras are one of the major cause of boobies cancer so do always remember to let your titties breathe as much as possible! And don't forget to do your annual mammogram check! And do participate in the Pink Ribbon Walk 2013!~

Mr.Smith,Bra Bra Black Sheep~

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Bedok Camp RT Color Tag Review.

Being an "active NSmen", doing my part for Singapore's defence is my 2nd nature. To give other service men better understanding of our army system is out of my call of duty but it is my honour to bring you more information.

It seems to me that the article about Female PTI has answered quite a bit of questions to many member of the public as well as fella soldiers.

In this article, I am sharing more information about RT and specifically the color tags. For many of the noobies, the color tag selection can be quite stressful. You do not wish to get a color tag that kills you during the training and neither do you want to get a tag take ask you to take a walk in the park. (It's a metaphor.)

So technically there are 4 colors to choose from: Red, Blue, Orange and Green. So which to take?

All names and content above are just for laugh. So take it with a pitch of salt ya?

Anyway, jokes aside, the basic logic about RT is to help you to pass your IPPT, frankly speaking, if we could pass the test easily why would we want to come for RT?

Personally I used to be able to pass my IPPT during active days. Not only because I had more time to practice or had a healthier diet but also because of the community. The people in the camp that motivates you and doing it together. All thanks to my injury shortly after my ORD, most of my fitness was lost during that period. I am trying to catch up again now but it's easier said than done after a good 8 years.

Mr.Smith, Happy RT-ing!

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I time travelled to the 60s and the 60s got better. #TrueStory

So few days ago my buddy Marty came looking for me. You guys know him, Marty... Right ?!

Bruce Willis in Try very very hard to die but still die hard. (Die Hard episode 87634123)

No. Not Mati (Die in Malay) but Marty.

Yeah me. From the movie - "back to the future". If you don't know him, you are way too young.

So he came to my place with his car and he was telling me he could bring me anywhere. And I joked about going to the 60s and god knows how he did it. We went back to the 60s.

Any time, any where.

We all know the 60s. One of the greatest era of current mankind and modern culture. The love, the music, the art, the movies and the historical events. Simply putting it, it's the turning point of what we are seeing, doing and loving today. There were a few places, time, people and things I wanted to meet or be part. It was suppose to be a very fun adventure trip but we kinda mess history up by getting all high and drunk at a party with some hipsters hippies. I don't know how but I kinda left my footprint all over even without social media in the 60s.

Music - Forming A Band.

I always wanted to be part of a band. I met this 4 youngsters and they were kinda like forming this insect band thingy but they only needed four person. So I might have said something bad about one of them "accidentally" and instead of him I was offered to play with them. We got pretty popular after that. Not too sure if I should be part of this though. I could hardly remember their names or the band's name as well, the weed sandwich was really strong. But I think we played some really awesome tunes like "Yellow Submarine", "Hard day's life" and "Come together."

I've no idea what I'm doing.

Art

Before I knew it, Marty got me to some factory place and I met this weird looking guy. Although he is a little weird but we had fun and we were partying. And we were betting on a game's result and coming from the future, I kinda know the result and I won. For losing the bet, he painted me in one of his silk screen painting thingy. When I returned to 2013 and googled about him, I realize that my painting was actually part of his exhibition and one of Singapore's famous blogger was there and actually shared my picture.

Singapore Famous Blogger.

One of the main pop art piece from the exhibition.

Event

I remember from some TV show that one of the darkest day of America in the 60s was the assassination of John F Kennedy.

I had no idea they took this picture of me but can you spot me?

I might have accidentally save him and because he didn't die, poor Lyndon didn't get to be a president and because of that, way too many historical event at USA changed and last I read George Bush is currently a professional basketball league coach instead. And as for me, I was named the America greatest hero of all times and I think they have a cartoon or some sort made after me. They even have a song like "Here I come to save the day, it's Smith Man and he's here to stay!."

Sports - NBA

After screwing all these up, I told Marty all I wanted is to watch a game of NBA and not be sported or be part of anything. We went to 1962 to watch the best game of NBA ever. The 1 and only 100 point game by a single man. Wilt. I don't know what happened but when I was going thru some of my old collection of NBA books yesterday, I found this!

LIKE WHAT?

Singapore News - 

I am not too sure what happened again (In the 60s, sandwiches are so so so common, and good, and strong, and cheap, and good.. and common).. but if you do a search on YouTube - "Smith Leong Crying 1965"; you will find this video...

Don't ask.

Overall it was an awesome trip. One of the best ever that Marty has brought me to. Doing and visiting all the things that I am interested in. From Music, Art, NBA, Event to even Local news. All these inspiring people and events that took place right in front of my eyes. Can you imagine how 60s will be if Social Media already existed there like today?

Will the Beatles be even more famous with Youtube? Will Andy Walhor's art be stolen by online IP thieves like me)? Will John F Kennedy really escape death because they got a tipoff from online source? Wilt would not even need to publish a book about his 100 points, he could have just blogged about it. And would MM Lee's crying video be auto-tuned?

I can't tell you how much I love our current life of technologies and how I might die without it but if given a choice, I would really travel to the 60s cause that's where modern culture first started and there is no way we could beat living in that era.

Mr.Smith, we all live in a yellow submarine.

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