Happy 2014!

Welcome to the brand new year!! 2014 is going to be LEGEN... WAIT FOR IT....

I am not too sure about you guys but I am a person who hates the year end. There are more than just a handful of reasons why I hated year end. Besides the fact that it is the holiday seasons where clients just disappears and work seems so slow and so not sexy, parties where you spend a lot more money and all you get in return is get fat.

It is also the raining season where you can hardly go out and play. Above all, the most painful thing about year end is because it is the time where we "look back".

We spend time every year setting goals and targets, new year resolution and what not but only to realize that we get distracted somewhere in between year after year and maybe not all but most of them are not being achieved at the end of it. The fact also comes served as a very cold dish to you that 1 year has past and you have a year less and a year closer to death, time is not always on your side and this is how procrastination has fucked you.

I'm never good dealing with the feeling of nostalgia. Looking back at the people who were once around me, people that come in and out of our lives. I am one of those people who treasure the thing and people around me a lot but more often than not I do not look like that. Recently I've spent a lot of time thinking about me and my friends.

The guys I used to spend most of my weekends with. The "normal~" gang.

I am one of those really blessed ones that my friends have accepted me for who I am, despite how impatient, direct (in terms or speech and things I want to say) and physically unavailable I am. I am always busy with some other people, doing stuff attending events or just choose to be alone at times. I have good people, guardian angel around me when I needed help or just someone to be there. People remember me and celebrates my birthdays so I guess many can put it in a way that I'm always the popular friend but I realized that people in my life come and go and it's partly because I never really make an effort to keep any friend specifically. I would put in effort trying to be in contact with everyone once in awhile, I will give my helping hand and listening ears to anyone who needs it, but I am never one who will always be there or make an effort to maintain a close friendship for a long period of time. I guess I do spread myself too thin sometimes.

Some of my favourite co-workers. Probably my favourite working environment after so many years and places.

If you are my friend reading this, I would like to apologize for the fact that I never call on important days, neither do I remember your birth dates, the lack of initiative to hold outings or dinner and maybe even missing out gatherings because I double booked or maybe just because I wish to stay at home and watch some porn. (heh, talking about priorities.) But I have to confess that I do miss each and everyone of you, from Secondary school to poly days, my ex colleagues, army kakis to many more. I hope I've touched your life before in one way or the other. I do not dare to ask for the slightest chance that you miss me too but I wish to tell you that I misses you guys in every other way.

Me and my armymates. The only thing we probably share is the bunk, not much of a common interest but I still miss the days we spent doing stupid stuff together.

I guess people grow up, people move on. Making new like-minded friends, getting attached, getting married, having a kid or two, relocating, getting a new jobs and many more other reasons why people gets drifted apart. It's a shame how sometimes something really good just can't stay good forever.  I guess this is just growing up.

Mr.Keong and I. Sometimes I've no idea why he hangsout with me considering how much I abuses him time to time. There's a lot of things that he does that I do not agree and I'm sure it's not 1 sided but we accept (kinda) each other the way we are. Or maybe because he is single for the longest time thus he have more time for me. LOL.

The interesting thing about friendship is that we are not exclusively committed to each other. We do not have written rules or how friends should treat each other and neither do we need to confess our love or even "breakup" with anyone with the classic "I don't friend you anymore" line.

Unless you are a follower of the bro code. Else, we do not have rules for being friends.

We come and go and if we are comfortable we stay. That being said, it also gets a little complicated when one party do a little more trying to keep everyone together while others just don't prioritize you in their lives.

Growing up together. I spent some of my happiest time with these boys and it's always comfortable hanging out with them cause we know how stupid we were when we were young cause we were all part of it together.

Of course, all said and done, we will never know who you will find in your life. Regardless of friends or partner, everyone will have someone out there who is willing to do something for you, grab a grenade for you or even put his hands on a blade for you. Maybe just that we, especially Asian do not tell that to each other that much. He or she might not hangout with you often but when needed you can always count on him like 1 2 3 where else on the other hand, those who are always around you during good times might not be there for you when the bad times come. I guess what matters the most is we have had each other in some part of our lives before.

Regardless of how long your friendship is, my instant brudder. The chiggar. LOL.

Being a blogger also means that I will meet unlimited people and making unlimited number of pretty bloggers who turns friend. We help each other by sharing our post, reading each others' blog and also chat online but we only meet up when there are events most of the time. That is a new type of friendship that not everyone can experience and I've no doubt in that either. I have no idea how much they treat me as friends, but I do treat them as friends and miss them too. Especially when they are all hot.

Pretty Bloggers,  pretty bloggers everywhere.

Good times with folks I met online. Not always together physically but always connected.

I've no idea how a 2014 kinda happy post ended up a little emo as I write on. This is the problem with not planning your post ahead I guess. Regardless of what is going to happen, I guess it's magical how people came into and left your life regardless of how or how long. Appreciate the people around you and love more in this 2014.

My evil twin back in school days. Miss those days back in school.

I was fortunate to start 2014 with some friends this year. We had a pretty chill and relax party at my place. It was pretty cool until they show Twilight on the TV and I almost lost a few friends instantly.

Countdown to 2014.

My best friends, my sister who shares most of my interest but more talented and less shameless. It is a blessing that we are so close despite of the age gap. It's one of the best gift my mum has given me. And my silly wife. Although we don't share a lot in common in terms of interest but she is always there for me and tries to put up with my lame shit. (I guess she doesn't have much choice.) LOL

I guess one of my resolution for 2014 would be to spend more time with friends around me physically instead of just via Twitter or Facebook. And if you didn't see a picture of yourselves here, I am sorry and that also means I haven't take much pictures with you, it doesn't means that you have been forgotten.

Mr.Smith, DARYYYYYYY

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Angels... You are my angel.

When I was younger, I believe that this is how angels should look like. Comes with Halo, wings and most likely in white.

I started playing Magic The Gathering and I was pretty sure this is the meaning of Angel.

Still white, comes with wings, no halo and a lot of jugs. One of the best white card one could have in his deck back in those days.

Soon puberty hit me and hit me hard. And this was Angel to me.

As compared to Serra, still white, full tits, blonde, hot but no wings, no sword and definitely not just a 4.

As years goes by, we will notice that there will be people around you that gives you a lift when needed, push you down and throw stones at you at the least expected moments. Some call them friends, some call those enemies but I choose to call them Angels.

Everyone is an Angel.

Angels come in every form, shape, sizes, age, sex or no sex. Everyone that comes into your life one way or the other, regardless of staying of leaving you is an angel. Why? Because they touched your life one way or the other. Taking it positively will just make you better.

There are angels that came into my life and messed it up. Pull me down, break me up and took everything from me. I learnt, I got wiser, I grow up better and I am now stronger. There are angels who came in my life, gave me love and shower me with care and stand by me. Trust me, believe me and allow me to grow. I always say this about myself, I am not the most thoughtful friend, I don't remember your birthday and very likely too lazy to call and talk to you but I am blessed this way that people around me love me and accept me for who I am. Some stayed, some did their part and left me, distanced but not forgotten for sure. You guys know who you are.

The Origin

Everyone came from heaven, a place where everyone was an angel. We are came down to earth or where we are to touch each other again. To complete each other's journey, to experience love, joy, pain. The love of having. The joy of getting and the pain of parting. When we truly experience all the things that we are required to experience again, we leave our body and we return to the land of angels to carry on our life in true form.

They come in different forms and when you least expect.  Some was given to you the moment you see light. Your parents, your family. Some come in as part of the plan, your neighbours, your schoolmates, your colleagues. some just pop in accidentally around the corner from the internet, your friends' friend or maybe just a stranger you see on bus daily. We have no idea how big a smallest action from one can impact another.

You are an Angel too

We might not have voice of Michael Jackson to heal the world, we might not be the GOAT on the basketball court to change others' life and we do not need to have the Hand of God to make history. A true heart filled with passion and love. Love for yourself and the community. Doing great and greater starting with the people beside you to a bigger world out there. Every action courts.

 I hope...

I haven't been the best person I could have been but I hope you can call me your angel. I hope I've touched your life some how in one way or the other. I wish you live long and prosper.

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Happy 30-1 Birthday to Me.

Warning: Wall of text blogpost that might have nothing to do with you. 

Within a blink of an eye I'm turning 30 - 1. There was this taxi uncle who told me that as a man we shall not reveal that we are 29 and 33 years old as it's bad luck. He didn't believed it when he was younger and bad bad things happened to him. Thus I'm saying that I'm 30-1.

Anyway, another year older just means another year of experience and another year of changes. As usual, (funny to say that) nothing stays the same or usual in my life.

This year I've lost some weight, ended my start-up, started another job, got a wife (I sound like I just got it off mailorderwife.com), got a place, got a dog, got another ink and of course, lost a love one.

The Party.

I miss this shit.

Every year, people celebrate their birthday for different reasons. Some wants a party, some wants to drink where else I'm just counting my blessing for who I am and where I am today. Not very successful but at least I've been to places, met people and done things many couldn't have done.

I never really liked to throw parties for my own birthday. I believe I've mentioned it over and over too often. About the reaction of people who attend for the sake of it, about how I feel about common scene at most parties where people just leave after cake cutting like they just can't wait. Receiving useless and not even pretty gifts from your good/close friends that you have expectation but only turned out to be nothing but a disappointment or rather not have. It's not about having a bad gift but it's about how much that person treasure your friendship. Rather have a cheap but at least something that represents you isn't it?  I guess I'm just negative like this when it comes to birthdays.

So for me it's always family dinner fun preferred. And of course, always crazy birthday presents that my brother will buy for me and birthday gifts that I will always extort from my sister.

"Eh, you know the new game? I buy and you pay for me okay?" 

On top of that I would have friends who will text me, bring me out for dinner, book my time to meet up. I love small meetup like these. Where we catchup on each others' happenings. Talk about what's next and an excuse to drink a beer or two. To be honest, I have no idea what I've done to deserve awesome friends like these people. People like BR man, Keong, Daniel (Mamba) Tan, Joy, Fiona, and many more. I'm never one that will remember others birthday but I'm really happy that these guys not only remember it but also make the effort to make me feel special even when I'm growing older but not wiser.

The thought of growing old hurt the most not because one looks old but because the chance of "making it happen" gets lower. Remember when you were younger we will always say things like "When I grow up, I want to be...", "When I grow up, I want to do this do that buy this and that." The painful part is when it dawns upon you that you can no longer say "when I grow up" because you are already all grown up.  How much more can one achieve or hope to achieve at the age of 40 or 50? And the fact is that life doesn't stop at 50.

The Regret.

"Never live your life in regrets, take responsibility for everything you have done and its consequences." - that's what I use to believe. If it's a mistake made, take it and move on and don't even look back but I'm biting on my own tongue for this. After certain chain of events, I've realize I do have a regret at the age of 30-1.

I was never competitive in sports at a younger age. I miss the chance that my brother had given me to play competitive sports along him. He always wanted me to spend more time on my fundamentals, he even wanted me to play at a higher level like he did when he injured his knee back then but it wasn't me. I never went for proper training, I never had a team and I never fought for something that I could have. The lack of discipline when it comes to training when I was younger. Looking back now when my lifestyle and my body doesn't allow me to do it anymore. It's a regret that could never be corrected. There is no way I can play basketball with you anymore. No way for you to be teaching me and coaching me anymore.

Birthday Wish.

Actually year in year out, my birthday wish has always been the same. For family happiness, health and wealth. And as a joke I would said I want world peace. This year... I wish I can meet you in my dreams, healthy and happy. Let's play ball!

I might be a little greedy this year to wish for an additional wish this year. I wish my friend Ming Hao who is fighting cancer will have a full and quick recovery. He is a nice man. Although we ain't close enough to be buddies but from the tweets I read and random short encounters we had, I believe his time is not yet up.



I know I am a blessed one, I know I have been lucky all these while, things falling into places for me in too many occasions despite some failures and hiccups in my life. I appreciates things and people around me for how it is/they are. In fact, I feel blessed just for breathing and able to open my (tiny) eyes every morning and seeing the happy faces around me but I wish you were here with me to see all these.

Mr.Smith, Happy Birthday Mr.Smith.

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