Who we are today is a collective result of the decisions we made yesterday. ~ Smithankyou

Do you remember your school days?

Only photo of me at James's graduation with the group of sohai. Photo by James's mum so it's a little blur. Oops.

I wanted to start this article with something along the lines of how I really hate such events considering that I did not even attend my own graduation for both my diploma and my degree, but then it dawned upon me that I'm a serious grinch for all happy events. Or at least events that are deemed happy to most people. I hate attending weddings, I hate Chinese New Year, and I also hate graduations. Seriously what am I?

So I thought I shall not start of the article with such negative vibes but I did it anyway. It seems.

However, I do like my days spent during polytechnic a lot. That was where I met my ex-gf now wife as well as many of my close friends. We spent a lot of time doing silly stuff, school events, hanging out at the canteen but maybe not so much of mugging for me. I'm not exactly the academic kinda kid. Poly days were fun for me, I organised events for the school and I was quite a popular kid (I choose to believe) despite the lack of looks. I mean it was an era where Young and Dangerous and F4 was the in thing so I'm not exactly them you see. Despite that, I know people, both students and teachers, and my guess is they like me pretty much. I mean why not right? I practically took the job off the lecturers' hand to plan school events and I was the guy who gave my peers CCA points. LOL.

I asked myself sometimes when I'm hiding in the toilet while trying to escape from reality, what would life been if not for my diploma education. All the what ifs. What if I did a little better and got into a JC instead? What if I did my part and select a course that I might excel in instead of choosing a course under the influence of my late brother. What if I decide to enter army before going through my diploma. I mean the obvious is that I would have not met my wife and not have my cute little baby.

Papa, I don’t feel so good - okay. Enough.

That aside, what about my career path? The people I met along the way? The butterfly effect is crazy. Probably 14million different storylines will just unfold at a snap of fingers.

Who we are today is a collective result of the decisions we made yesterday. If I'm actually happy with where I am now, so what's the concern about those decisions made yesterday? Would I be in a better place? Maybe this blog wouldn't even exist for various reasons. I might probably even not met any of you guys.

Enough of self doubting. Let's get back to the event.

That's James and his mum. I feel strangely vulgar every single time I talk about someone's mum. I really have to cut back on the "your mum" jokes.

James is one of my crew I met some years ago while playing basketball. The group of us became really close friends and we spent so much time together every week. He also trains me at the gym. It's not his fault I'm still fat, it's me that I haven't really been very consistent with the whole gym thing. But that's another story.

I love these guys, they are fun, young and we do silly things together besides balling. Amongst all the jokes and laughter I take it upon myself to make them a better version of themselves. They will always come to me for different type of advise, from relationship to career moves. Sometimes they do tell me that they appreciate the help and guidance I give them and I'm glad I'm making a difference in their lives. One thing for sure is that I've always love working with teenagers, my staffs, my interns, my students back when I was doing part-time teaching. In fact who knows, I might just go fully into academic some day.

As much as I enjoy hanging out with them, I question my actions one time too often. I wonder if I should be hanging out with real adults. If I'm actually too old to be hanging out with them, partying, gaming, balling, learning all the silly youngsters internet meme. Do I have issues that I don't see? Am I refusing to grow up? Is it the sense of accomplishment that I'm feeding on from helping them and solving their problems? Am I feeding my own ego? Shouldn't I be like hanging out with people my own age, talking about property investments, drinking wine, and sleeps at 10pm? Is it about time that I let go of these frivolous activities and grow up? I do not have an answer and who cares right? A minute of self doubt is always better than a life that is nothing but dull.

ANNNYWAY.. So I was at his graduation. I asked him to pose for a photo for memory sake right, since I'm already there. And this is what I got.