Asshole online, Asshole offline.
Whatever the case, besides this, people also call me the following:
- Genius.
- Billionaire.
- Playboy.
- Philanthropist.
About right.
Smith the Playboy
I mean I can totally understand the rest but I totally have no idea how me being a playboy come about. I am not the most handsome and neither do I have muscles all over me. I am actually quite stingy with the wallet too. I mean unless you guys really think every girl is a sucker for a smart and shameless guy. Probably that's me.
I asked around and for the silliest reason it might be, the reason might be because of my social media upload. So they say I always upload pictures of other girls and that makes me a bad husband and a fake husband. I wonder if beating my wife behind close door makes me a better husband as long as I do not upload pictures of me and my friends.
I mean I get it, some people thinks that posting such pictures are disrespectful to my wife and even my mum complains about them but hey, taking picture hor, not having sex leh.
That being said, I do believe I am not the best husband around especially with this quote I think I heard off some movie,
" A good husband should only be good to 1 woman. A man who is good to every woman doesn't make a good husband" - Maybe there's a better way to say this but I think it is something along this line.
Eh Bro, how you know this girl ah?
Trust me, I have guys coming to me saying shit like the reason they are single is because they do not have a proper career, because they are poor, because they are fat or some what ridiculous convenient excuses. Trust me, having those might make things easier for you to get a chick but it ain't the end of the world without these. And people always ask me
"Eh Bro, how you know this girl ah? Intro leh!"
The magic is that there is no magic. I am going to share with you some of my girls and the story of how we met. Yes, if you are reading this in the future say 2035, This is the story of "How I met YOUR MotherS"
Who: @Melpig on Twitter
Marital Status: Getting Married Soon
How I Met Your Mother: On Twitter. Got to know her better because of a missing dog that I found and she fostered for a night. We then got to know each other better because we spent a lot of time together being part of Lions Club Singapore. Although we are always suanning each other but I know she care a lot about me. She is one of those friends that will always help me if I need help anytime.
Who: @pingpingss on Twitter
Marital Status: Mystery
How I Met Your Mother: On Twitter. Technically met her because of work. I was doing social listening (basically stalking about that talks about my company) and she check-in on foursquare at my office area. Went to say hi, met her, basketball fan, lakers fan, lots of things in common.
Who: @Meiyan on Instagram
Marital Status: Unwanted. Anyone interested can check her out
How I Met Your Mother: On Twitter. (again, I know). She had this bio that says "Geek in short skirt". I wanted to ask her where to buy nice short skirt and I talked to her. That did not happen. We just chat, she broke up, I wanna intro her some friends which I did but nothing happened out of that. We became very close friends and she was my wife's "sister" during her wedding.
Who: @Cyndixys_ on Instagram
Marital Status: Recently Married. (don't be sad guys.)
How I Met Your Mother: Found her off her blog. Simple reason because she was cute but I felt cheated because she is actually pretty "mature" and not as young as she was supposed to be. But lucky she is really as cute as those pictures. Got to know her better off Twitter and then event. Attended her wedding recently and I love her hubby. Super cute guy lah! Very sorry I only had this very old picture. Point to note, need to take a new one coming meet up.
Who: @Carriesim on Twitter
Marital Status: Attached for the longest time
How I Met Your Mother: On Twitter. Apparently I managed to find some excuse to know her better. It was something to do with some abandon cats or what which I can hardly remember. First saw her in person at an event at Hardrock cafe. Very young lady who acts really way more mature than her age. One of those that you can party with as well as talk about serious work shit.
Who: @Euniqyou on Instagram
Marital Status: My Ex...Office Wife.
How I Met Your Mother: Ex Colleague. I 1st attended events that she organized and I did not like her at all. She looks too atas and snobbish for my liking but she is super cute and awesome after I got to know her better. She recruited me to join the Avengers and that was where we shared some tears, laughter and our sandwich lunch. One of my favorite ex colleague of all time.
Who: @Michelleagy on Instagram
Marital Status: I also dunno.
How I Met Your Mother: At event. She was really really young when I met her. So I heard she was some miss Singapore finalist which she reminded me times after times not to remind people but I am doing it anyway. Anyway, she is the one who got away. As in she have been doing her major MIA since changed of job. Young, ambitious and you might wanna give her a ping if these quality turns you on.
Who: Joy on my phone book.
Marital Status: erm....
How I Met Your Mother: Ex Client. She is one of those very few friends that I met and kept until today despite both our crazy schedule and her not having any social media presence at all. She used to be my "penpal" because we write emails to each other. She is currently outstation very often and i think I might have to revert to that way to communicate with her real soon. So I have no idea if she is single or not to be honest.
Who: @axixe on Instagram
Marital Status: Single and Ready To Mingle
How I Met Your Mother: On Twitter. One of those random girls that I followed for the longest time and never talked to until one fine day when she needed social media help. So I came... into her life and we quickly became good friends. She kinda guest write for me for a short period of time until she got lazy.
Who: @Rachist on Instagram
Marital Status: No Clue
How I Met Your Mother: Through a friend. Actually through Carrie Sim from above. Not sure how it happened but most likely because I was a horn dog but she later became of colleague and now she is probably an cowboy at old west or something because I've never heard from her ever since she joined her new company.
Who: @Waddafad on Instagram
Marital Status: My Malay Girlfriend
How I Met Your Mother: Ex Colleague. My favouritest malay girl friend of all time. She is super fun to hangout with. She is like my Jukebox before we have Soundhound and YouTube. Ask her any songs and she will know the title. She is also very punny with her jokes. Miss sharing office with her where she will always ask me what I want from the pantry but never delivers.
Who: @Priscias on Instagram
Marital Status: Single
How I Met Your Mother: At Event/Twitter. She is one of the 1st batch of Friends I made off Twitter. I met her at an event where it is for Twitter users so ya. Twitter/Events. She is also one of those regular that I will drink coffee with at Tampines before I decided to move to Punggol where I do not get to see my friends ever again... EVERRRRRR..
Who: @behindthebasics on Instagram
Marital Status: My BBFF
How I Met Your Mother: During Zumba Lesson. Long story short, I got challenged by a group of female bloggers to join a Zumba lesson and there I was dancing and so was she. We soon became good friends because people find us weird while we find others weird. We have confessed our love for each other very quickly and we are now #BBFF (Blogger Best Friends Forever) Status. Patent Pending.
Who: @Odetothemuse on Instagram
Marital Status: Waiting for you.
How I Met Your Mother: Ex Client. Very nice client. Started talking about work and what not and realized that she has an Ah Lian inside. Obviously we became good friends and we are currently working on some projects too. Ooops, if you are her son, sorry to break the news to you that your mum is a ex-lian.
Who: @xbecksbeckx on Instagram
Marital Status: Single like a Single Line Book
How I Met Your Mother: On OkCupid. You read that right, I was on OKC too. I downloaded OKC back then when I was working on some social app. For research purposes, *cough*, I managed to make a friend off OKC but I only 1st met her recently during Halloween as we were both at the same place.
Who: Silver Ang leh, how can you not know her? #MyFamousFriend
Marital Status: Attached.
How I Met Your Mother: At an Event where I was the sponsor and she was an invited guest! To be honest, when I met her I also dunno who she was because I was stuck in the army during the whole SuperStar Period and TV was nothing but history to me. I only know she was pretty and she caught my eyes and there after we bump into each other a few other times during events. I can haolian and tell you hor, celebrity also human cause she also very lame off screen, eat the same food and also will say "excuse me, I wanna go washroom" .
Who: @MelvaSG on Instagram
Marital Status: Single. Not for the weak
How I Met Your Mother: On Facebook. Met her at some event but she didn't see me or didn't even know I was there. Added her on Facebook there after and we soon became drinking kaki. Simply because... because alcohol? What other reasons do you need?
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So there you go, here are some of my "girls" that I want to show off. So what is the point of this post? My point is that opportunity is all over the place. Regardless online or offline you get to meet people if you wear the swag. Although through my "case studies" I have shared, I met many of them off Twitter but that is also because that was the in-thing previously.
Of course I also wanna share with you some of my single friends that you can target and talk to right? Just let me know who you wish to know and don't go message them yourselves off Facebook, that is just creepy.
Yes, being creepy is the reason why you guys are single. Not because you are fat or poor or do not have a career. What matters most to a woman is that you make them feel comfortable and you love them the way they want to.
And no, do not 'Eh Bro' me if you wanna know them. You already failed before you even started.
My Wife?
So many have asked me about my wife's opinion about me and "the girls" and here's my 2 reply to you.
1. My wife is more confident about herself and us than you can imagine.
2. I really uploaded these pictures because I look good.
And kids, now here are the stories of how I met your mothers.
P.S. Do not be sad if you are not featured here, simply because we do not have a nice picture together so next time we take nice nice pictures okay?
1 comments:
Omg u featured me!!! *shy* (eh we don't have better pictures together???)
Thank you once again for coming for that play! :D
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